Selfish

Do it for yourself. Make time for you. Find some space to be alone for once.

These are words and thoughts that are taboo in our culture. They are the epitome of self over others that is so readily disgraced by the masses. It is the self in the centre, the one above the whole. The member over the tribe. It feels wrong to say it and even more wrong to recommend it.

I need you to be selfish.

Being a little selfish with your time, your energy, and your decision making is exactly what you need.

But what does selfish look like?

For me it looks like this. Being a little selfish mid-week, being overly attentive to work, being under productive when it comes to cooking dinners. Worrying less on the weekends re the lawn to be mowed and ore on the energy that needs to be regained. It looks like booking time each week to sit alone and read. It looks like some carefully measured time in front of a video game and an uncarefully measured whiskey.

Because what is on the other side of selfish?

On the other side of selfish is progress. It is in the selfishly booked in training time that the muscle grows and fat disappears. It is here that businesses thrive and cashflow is boosted. Here still that lives are built and dreams fulfilled. On the other side of selfish is selfless. Working hard when you say you will allows you total freedom to be present when you say. To free your mind fully knowing that your effort has not been misplaced. Selfless because your selfish time brings joy to others. It brings security, safety and a feeling of calm. From here is where the true magic begins. Great ideas are only born in freedom and safety.

But it doesn’t have to be all one sided. What could selfishly unselfish look like?

In my house it appears simply. The laundry done on a Wednesday. The meals prepared and retrieved after long days. It looks like a bed made in advance and every possible move made to ensure that my morning runs smoothly. This means no misplaced socks, a coffee cup ready and a meal already in my bag. This means prepared and booked workouts and work blocks. And fun blocks. Diet breaks, cheat days, mental reprieve. All of this is important. Treats and trinkets are also incredibly valuable. If you want that monkey to do the trick again, make it worth his while.

Be selfish, treat your self from time to time. Remember that you can always give back twice as much.